A zoo had a very rare species of gorilla and 
the female became very ornery, and difficult 
to handle. Upon examination, it was determined 
that she was in heat. What what to do? There 
was no male of this species available.

The zoo administrators noticed Mike who was 
responsible for cleaning the animals' cages. 
Mike, it was rumored, possessed ample ability 
to satisfy any female, and he wasn't very bright. 
Perhaps they could entice Mike to satisfy the 
female gorilla. So he was approached with a 
proposition: would he be willing to screw the
 gorilla - for five hundred bucks? Mike replied 
that he might be interested, but would have to 
think the matter over.

The following day, Mike announced that he would 
accept their offer, but only under three 
conditions: 

"First," he said, "I don't want to have to 
kiss her", and "Second, I want nothing to do 
with any offspring that may result from this 
union". The zoo administration quickly acceded 
to these conditions, but what could be the third? 

"Well," said Mike, "You've gotta give me another 
week to come up with the five hundred bucks".